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Poisoning Pigeons in the Park

from Smarm​-​Proof Lobster Cabinet by Insane Ian

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about

Tom Lehrer's songs entered the public domain recently, so I thought now would be a great time to cover one of his classics. I also passed this idea along to my fellow comedy musicians at The FuMP, so you may be hearing more folks do something like this soon.

lyrics

Spring is here
A-suh-puh-ring is here
Life is skittles and life is beer
I think the loveliest time
Of the year is the spring
I do (US TOO) 'Course you do
But there's one thing
That makes spring complete for me
And makes every Sunday
A treat for me

All the world seems in tune
On a spring afternoon
When we're poisoning pigeons in the park
Every Sunday you'll see
My sweetheart and me
As we poison the pigeons in the park

When they see us coming
The birdies all try and hide
But they still go for peanuts
When coated with cyanide
The sun's shining bright
Everything seems all right
When we're poisoning pigeons in the park

We've gained notoriety
And caused much anxiety
In the Audubon Society
With our games
They call it impiety
And lack of propriety
And quite a variety
Of unpleasant names
But it's not against any religion
To want to dispose of a pigeon

So if Sunday you're free
Why don't you come with me
And we'll poison the pigeons in the park
And maybe we'll do
In a squirrel or two
While we're poisoning pigeons in the park

We'll murder them all
Amid laughter and merriment
Except for the few
We take home to experiment
My pulse will be quickenin'
With each drop of strychnine
We feed to a pigeon
(It just takes a smidgin!)
To poison a pigeon in the park

credits

from Smarm​-​Proof Lobster Cabinet, released March 10, 2023
Words and music by Tom Lehrer
Arrangement by Ben Stahl
Vocals by Insane Ian
Backing vocals and music performed by Ben Stahl

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Insane Ian Chicago, Illinois

Insane (adj): shocking, outrageous

"Insane Ian is a Comedy Rock God" - Dr Demento

“If you like video games and hiphop and you don't listen to Insane Ian...You're. Missing. Out.” - Mikey Mason (on The Funny Music Podcast)

"...the guy who's an even-geekier heir to the Weird Al throne..." - Jay Hathaway (URLesque)

Comedy music and Nerdcore Hiphop, as heard on TheFuMP.com and the Dr Demento Show. ... more

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