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The Ultra Epic Video Game Medley IV: Guns of the Last Nightmare New Patriot Revelations

from The Epic Video Game Medley Collection by Insane Ian

/

about

Another year, another new Epic Video Game Medley. New for 2013. This time around, we're parodying hits by Motley Crüe ("Shout at the Devil"), Bowling For Soup ("1985"), Kelly Clarkson ("Stonger"), Hall and Oates ("Maneater"), Kansas ("Carry On My Wayward Son"), Nicki Minaj ("Starships"), Fallout Boy ("My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark"), Madonna ("Borderline"), and Carly Rae Jepsen ("Call Me Maybe").

lyrics

Resident Evil
Parody of "Shout at the Devil" by Motley Crue
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

(Brains, Brains, Brains)
(Brains, Brains, Brains) RESIDENT EVIL!

Hear the wolf screaming lonely in the night
See the blood stain on the ground
This must be a dream
Where's the rest of Alpha Team?
And look at all the bodies
We found
Well the folks that are dead
We have to shoot in the head
Or they'll get up and walk around
Everybody is a Zombie
All dressed in Ambercrombie
As they all shout for

(Brains, Brains, Brains) Resident Evil
(Brains, Brains, Brains) RESIDENT EVIL!

Metal Gear Solid
Parody of "1985" by Bowling for Soup
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

Well there is Big Boss, and FOXHOUND,
Sneaking while on the ground
Revolver Ocelot
I have such trouble with the plot
The stories are so cool
But in 2 Raiden's a tool
A cardboard box is where I hid
In Metal, Metal, Metal Gear Solid

What Doesn't Kill You (Smaller)
Parody of "What Doesn't Kill You (Stronger)" by Kelly Clarkson
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

You think they got the best of you
I think you'll have the last laugh
Bet you'll get the upper hand on the Koopa gang
Bowser's gone and captured me
He knows you'll come running back
Baby don't you worry, go and do your thang

What doesn't kill you makes you smaller
Mushrooms make you taller
You know how to stomp the Goombas best
This leaf and tail makes you a fly-er
Flowers give you fire
Come here and rescue your Princess

What doesn't kill you makes you smaller, smaller
Just say "Hey, it's-a me!"
What doesn't kill you makes you smaller
Mushrooms make you taller
That's what makes you super, Mario

Mario...

Tomb Raider
Parody of "Maneater" by hall & oates
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

Oh, oh, here she comes
Watch her open that treasure chest
Oh, oh, here she comes
She's a Tomb Raider

Oh, oh, here she comes
With her big guns, and pistols too
Oh, oh, here she comes
She's a Tomb Raider

Katamari Damacy
Parody of "Carry on My Wayward Son" by Kansas
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

Katamari is a ball
Rolls on stuff, picks up it all
Make it bigger just to please the
King of All Cosmos

Starfox
Parody of "Starships" by Nicki Minaj
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

Starfox

Unh.

Let’s fly through space, ace
Name the time and place
They-say-the same thing every day
"You stink, fink, you don't know how to fly"
But fox pilots like me are hard to come by
The zone, own, yes I’m in the zone
The boss, hoss, is that Andross
Are there two, or four, wings on this ship
I’ma blow up his face and don’t give two spits

I’m Fox McCloud, Cloud
I love to fly
My dad'd be proud, proud
Except he died
I'm flyin' now, now
Up in the sky
and then go pow, pow
Shoot Andross in his eye

Starfox has flight control
Falco just has no soul
Slippy is in trouble
Let’s do a barrel roll
(Oh oh, oh oh)

Starfox was meant to fly
His Arwing across the sky
Andross ain't a nice guy
Can't stop...

(Go and do a barrel roll)

Creatures Know When You're Alone in the Dark (Light 'Em Up)
Parody of "My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark (Light 'Em Up)" by Fallout Boy
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

Oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, ah-ah-alone.
Oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, ah-ah-alone.

B-B-B-Be careful of the creatures in the night, night
Edward Carnby will do what's right, right
And besides in the mean, mean time
They're just dreaming of tearing you apart

I'm just a de-detective who is mortal
But I deal with things that're strictly para-normal
Once the ground opens up again
Don't look now but Hell's within
Gonna need a spark to ignite

Creatures know when you're Alone in the Dark

So light 'em up, up, up
Light 'em up, up, up
Light 'em up, up, up
They're on fire

So light 'em up, up, up
Light 'em up, up, up
Light 'em up, up, up
They're on fire

Oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, alone.
In the dark, dark
Oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, alone.
In the dark, dark

Borderlands
Parody of "Borderline" by Madonna
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

Just grab all of the loot, I've shot all I can shoot,
'Cause I've got the best weapons

Borderlands
Got to follow Tannis' plan
I just got to open the Vault out in the Borderlands

Borderlands
Handsome Jack will make a stand
If you keep mining Eridium out in the Borderlands

Call of Duty
Parody of "Call Me Maybe" by Carly Rae Jepsen
New lyrics by Ian Bonds

I shot a noob, what a dope,
As he repelled from a rope,
I looked through my sniper scope,
And now you're in my sights

Threw a grenade over head,
And then I hid in the shed
Airstrike made most of them dead,
But now you're in my sights

Your stare was holdin',
One clip, no reloadin'
'Nade toss, you're explodin'
Where do you think you're spawning, buddy?

Hey, I just shot you,
And this is crazy,
You upped my kill streak,
In Call of Duty!

It's hard to aim right
At you, truly
but thanks for the perks,
In Call of Duty!

Hey, I just shot you,
Right in the booty,
Your number's up now,
In Call of Duty!

And all the other noobs,
Play co-op Zombies,
But I'll just kill you,
In Call of Duty!

©2013 Idolize W.A.Y. Recordings/Ian Bonds

credits

from The Epic Video Game Medley Collection, track released April 23, 2013
New lyrics by Ian Bonds
Music performed by Ben Stahl
Lead vocals on "Smaller" by The Stacey

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Insane Ian Chicago, Illinois

Insane (adj): shocking, outrageous

"Insane Ian is a Comedy Rock God" - Dr Demento

“If you like video games and hiphop and you don't listen to Insane Ian...You're. Missing. Out.” - Mikey Mason (on The Funny Music Podcast)

"...the guy who's an even-geekier heir to the Weird Al throne..." - Jay Hathaway (URLesque)

Comedy music and Nerdcore Hiphop, as heard on TheFuMP.com and the Dr Demento Show.
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