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Insane Ian and Cutesylvania - It's BurgerTime

from Internet Famous by Insane Ian

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Insane Ian and Cutesylvania finally join together to discuss their love of fast food! And then immediately regret it.


[II] Hey Steffo!
[S] What's up Ian?
[I] I'm gettin' a little hungry
[S] oh my god yes
[I] I think It's about time we get our grub on, whadda ya say?
[S] Let's do this, what's your poison?
[I] Well...

We've gotta eat, but it's gotta be quick
I'm thinking fast food will do the trick
A burger that's thick, a large order of fries
Two Happy Meals, check inside for the prize
Open wide for the pies, try apple or cherry
The filling is hot? Oh it's very very
It's not just warm, it's filled with lava
Gonna wash that down with some cola, not aqua
I know it's a problem eating out every night
But the food is so good and the price is just right
It's not really healthy, but that doesn't matter
Better slow with the chatter, soda filled up my bladder
Now back to the counter, order up another meal!
A double quarter pounder for a quarter, that's a steal!
Say what was my prize in my box of child rations?
The sword, Excaliburger! (mostly used for distractions)

[I] When you gotta eat quick, don't care if you get sick
[S] When the world's your playplace take your pick
[I] When you think it might be meat, but you don't really mind
It's Burgertime!
[S] It's Burgertime?

[S] When the back of your jacket and your buttons break loose
[I] When a pickle's chasing you, and an egg is too!
[S] Put the fries on the side this time. Why?
It's Burgertime!
[BOTH] It's Burgertime!

[Steffo's verse spoken intro]

[S] When I get a burger I get just meat and cheeze. Nothing else. Except more meat and cheese.
[I] What about the bun?
[S] And bun. Meat cheese and bun.
[I] And the wrapper?
[S] Got a rapper right here!

[Steffo's verse]

My name's Steffo, hello Hungry
Let's get drive-through, just take my money
I swear to the fryguys I'll hamburgle the whole place
If my car's not chock full of patties for the home base
And seriously who gets a single burger anymore?
And seriously who gets burgers from the store?
And I don't mean a ground-up pound of chuck
But those radioactive frozen cow pucks
I can settle for a double, no WAIT
I can settle for a triple, no WAIT
I can settle for a secret menu 20 patty with a
Waterfall of imitation cheddar (so happy)
Yes I look pregnant, No I'm not pregnant
I have a condition, I'm allergic to running
The Lovechild of Wendy & Ron Swanson
Prepare yourselves...Dinner is coming.

[S] When you have an emergency whopper fund
[I] When you think it might be fun to enjoy some toasty buns!
[S] When the floor of your car looks like a Ronald shrine
It's Burgertime
[I] It's Burgertime!
When you've haven't got a care, be a dollar menu-naire!
[S] When you open up new line of burger-wear
[I] When you hear how fat you are by the B words in every line
It's *B*urgertime!
[S] It' B-uh...urgertime

[Third verse spoken intro]
[I] Oh man...I think we may have overdone it
[S] (no moreeeeeeeeeeee)
[I] But we have one more verse to go
[S] Just one more sip of this shake. Oh my god, it's so good...

[Third verse]
[I] After all of these burgers, I packed the pounds on like girders
I'd walk the weight off but I can't walk any further
I'm starting to feel a sharp pain in my chest
I'll see a doc once this triple stack's finished
[S] Maybe I should switch up my diet, I don't need this
Something a little more healthy, like cheese stix
AHHHHHHH I'm done running, you can meet me
Sitting on the boombox playing eye of the tiger on repeat
[I] Feel like I'm moving half-speed, those kids are moving past me
Think that I just ordered a McAngioplasty
I think we should stop, please cut me some slack
I might be having a Big Mac HEART Attack
[S] Crawling? It's a reliable form of transport
I can use my inhaler like a jet pack
There's a jack in the box locked in my GPS
all this concern for heath? a minor set back

[I] When you've got shortness of breath, but there's still some room left
[S] Just yelling random numbers like a menu Roulette
[I] My left arm kind of hurts, but otherwise I'm fine!
It's Burgertime
[S] It's Burgertime
When your order sliders 'cause you consider them petite!
[I] When your love of meat won't let you see your feet
[S] If you need a reminder, HMM lemme see...
It's Burgertime
[I] It's Burgertime

[Spoken outro as it fades out]
[I] Actually, I think it's exercise time, don't you?
[S] The gym has a good vending machine
[I] Ooh, the gym! Yeah, that reminds me, I need to train up my pokemon
[S] But not on an empty stomach!
[I] Yeah! I think the McRib is back...mmm...Yoga Mat...


from Internet Famous, released November 11, 2014
It's Burgertime
By Insane Ian and Cutesylvania
Lyrics by Ian Bonds and Steffeny Messinger
Music by Yoshihisa Suzuki & Masaya Matsuura (Toasty Buns) and Chris Cox (Main Stage Theme)
Music arranged by Steffeny Messinger




Insane Ian Chicago, Illinois

Insane (adj): shocking, outrageous

"Insane Ian is a Comedy Rock God" - Dr Demento

“If you like video games and hiphop and you don't listen to Insane Ian...You're. Missing. Out.” - Mikey Mason (on The Funny Music Podcast)

"...the guy who's an even-geekier heir to the Weird Al throne..." - Jay Hathaway (URLesque)

Comedy music and Nerdcore Hiphop, as heard on TheFuMP.com and the Dr Demento Show.
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